Cheating Bastards

Sombody Could Protest (but I'm Not Suggesting They Do)

So the first of possibly quite a few sporting disappointments at the London 2012 Olympics for Team GB, this afternoon with the British Men’s

Olympic Gestapo Beat up and pepper spray disabled man

UK - Britain Olympic Gestapo yesterday beat up and pepper sprayed a disabled man on a mobility scooter after he was hit a glancing blow

What I Saw At The Opening Ceremony

I heard that they ceased killing & injuring one another in Syria just to watch the Opening Ceremony of the London 2012 Olympic Games….Oh no actually they didn’t because

The Official Wank Wipe Of The Olympics

Durex have been giving out free condoms to athletes in the Olympic village because Durex are the official condom of the London 2012 Olympic Games & it does beg the

No Freedom Of Expression Coz We Are Hosting The Olympics

Okay I did promise I’d not piss on anybody’s enjoyment of the Olympics, but this doesn’t mean I’m not going to criticize some of

I'm Not Going To Piss On The Olympics

I might object that as far as I know there was no real democratic forum for people to voice an opinion directly on whether they wanted London to host the Olympics. I

This summer, why not soothe your Olympic Rings with Anusol.

British Business Betrayed: It's a Titanic, Britannic and Olympic Fuck up

UK - The premise that the Olympic wankfest would bring regeneration, and prosperity to East London has been

Why Do I Have To Apologise For Liking Snooker

This weekend it’s the start of the World Snooker Championships & for the next two weeks I’ll be glued to the television watching at every opportunity

Bye Bye Basil

Thank goodness there’s now a generation that has grown up post the Apartheid system & all that was despicably evil about it.

Back in the 1960s the British public on the whole wasn’t aware of the

RIP The Hurricane

Many years ago I went drinking with Alex Higgins & survived!

I got very drunk on the expense of Alex, but that’s what I remembered of my encounter with Alex that he seemed to want to ensure

Let's Play Darts

Did you know Martin Adams the most recent winner of the World Darts Championship is in fact Dr Adams as he’s a qualified doctor. Yeah a fully qualified doctor isn’t the stereotypical image many

The Day a Rugby Game Healed A Nation

I remember when I was a kid growing up first in South Africa & then in Britain I wondered why it was that I never saw a South Africa never played England or Australia

Brilliant Bolt (But I Bet The Cynics Will Be Sniping)

Tonight at the World Athletics Championships Usain Bolt smashed 200m world record just as he smashed he smashed the 100m world record at the

In 1985 Dennis Taylor won the World Snooker Championship, after being 0-8 frames down Taylor won 18-17 on the black ball.

Its often included in the

New Tactics help Pakistan to win Sri Lankan test!

Pakistan - Lahore The Pakistani test cricket board has selection of a new team to play the Sri Lankan's paid off magnificently, with Pakistan

Bong! Michael Phelps receives three-month suspension!

USA - Multi-Olympic gold medallist and pot head Michael Phelps has been suspended from competition for three months by his swimming

Bong! Michael Phelps is a pot head!

Michael Phelps the greatest Olympian of our generation, a man who wins gold medals and smashes world records in his sleep…is a pothead!!! Oh yeah when Michael Phelps is

Dwain Chambers runs for the Pharmaceutical Industry

UK - Self-confessed drug cheat Dwain Chambers to run for Britain's pharmaceutical industry in the 60m sprint at the World Indoor Championships

Woolmer Silenced by Betting Syndicates

Jamaica - In another exclusive The Bastard has discovered that Pakistan's cricket coach, Bob Woolmer was murdered in order to prevent him lifting the

NFL to Sue Bush and Maliki!

US - Lawyers for the National football league have announced that they are to sue the President G W Bush and Iraqi Prime Minister Nouri Maliki for breach of contract.

The

Ashes: Flintoff demonstrates superior display of pluckiness

Australia - England’s not particularly good first innings was followed by a fairly good one for Australia, which was followed

Ashes: England still shite

Australia - The fourth Ashes match in Melbourne started off with England playing true to form, and being utterly piss-poor, with the first innings over for a feeble 159 all-out.

Germany - Top German motorist Martin Schumacher has announced that he has decided to throw in the towel, and finally get himself a proper job. Seven times

England Women accused of 'Sledging'

India - Mithali Raj, the captain of the India Women's' Cricket Team, has accused the English Women's' Cricket Team of 'Sledging' them: that is, using foul language

Cyclist passes Drugs Test!

France - The world of professional cycling was rocked today by a negative drugs test for a competitor in the Tour de France. The sponsors of this years tour are demanding his

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